Best Slots Near Me

Find restaurants, bars, and businesses in Illinois that carry video slot machines and games. Awesome Hand Gaming provides slot machines and games for restaurants and bars in DuPage, Kane, Lake, or McHenry counties. Horseshoe Hammond. #1 of 1 Casinos & Gambling in Hammond. “Great atmospheric. Houston Casino & Poker Rentals. Casino Party Rental 21 YEARS.

by John Robison
Do the slot machines on the ends of aisles pay better than the machines in the middle? How about the machines near the table games? They’retight, right? And are the machines near the coin redemption booths loose? Join us on our journey for finding loose slot machines.
The loose slot machine is the slot player’s Holy Grail. Much as King Arthur’s Knights of the Round Table searched Britain for the Holy Grail of myth, slot players search casinos for loosemachines. Slot players have formulated many theories about where casinos place their loose machines to aid them in their quest.

Before we can figure out where the loose machines are, we have to figure out what they are. There is no U.S.D.A. system for grading the looseness of machines and no national orinternational standard that determines whether a machine is tight or loose.

So, what is a loose slot machine?

Say we have two 94% payback machines. Are they loose? I bet some people say yes and some say no. Why isn’t there agreement? Let me add a little more information to thescenario to see if it gives you an idea of why one person calls a 94% payback machine loose and another calls it tight. What if I told you that one machine was a nickel machine and theother a dollar machine? For most people who play nickel machines, a 94% machine is among the best-paying machines in their area. For most people who play dollar machines, on theother hand, a 94% machine is among the worst-paying machines in their area. The person who called 94% loose probably plays lower-denomination machines, while the person who called 94%tight probably plays higher-denomination machines.
Let me add one more piece of information. The dollar machine is a video poker machine. Dollar video poker players would rather have root canals onall their teeth with no anesthesia while their fingernails and toenails are ripped off than play a 94% payback machine. They have many adjectives for a 94% payback machine, but loose isnot one of them.
You see, loose isn’t an absolute. Looseness depends on your frame of reference. Looseness is actually a comparison. We shouldn’t say “loose.” We should really say“looser”. We should really be asking where the looser machines are. But let’s bow to common usage and continue using the term loose machine.

So, what is a loose machine?

Quite simply, a loose machine is a machine that has a higher long-term payback percentage than another machine. The loose machines in acasino are those machines that have the highest paybacks. These are the machines that will take the smallest bites out of your bankroll in the long run. No wonder slot players areconstantly searching for them.
Over the years, players have developed a number of theories about finding loose slot machines. Casinos place loose machines near the entrances, for example, so passersby can see playerswinning and are enticed to enter the casino and try their luck. The loose machines are also at the ends of the aisles to draw players into the aisle, where the tight machinesare.
And, of course, a loose machine is always surrounded by tight machines. You never have two loose machines side by side. That’s done for players who like to play more than onemachine at a time. If they should happen to stumble upon one of the loose machines, they’ll be pumping their winnings from it into the tight machines around it.
More theories. The machines near the table games are tight because table games players don’t want to hear a lot of bells and buzzers going off and happy slot players whooping it up aftera big win. Another reason the machines near the table games are tight is because table games players will occasionally drop a few coins into a slot machine and they don’t expect to winanything, so why give them a high payback.
Similarly, the machines near the buffet and show lines are tight. People waiting in line are just killing time and getting rid of their spare change. They’re not going to play for along time or develop a relationship with those machines, so the machines can be like piggy banks – for the casino! Money goes in and rarely comes back out.
The machines near the coin redemption booths, on the other hand, are loose. Players waiting in line for coin redemption are slot players and the casino wants them to see other playerswinning. Seeing all those players winning will make them anxious to get back on the slot floor to try their luck again.
Finally, finding loose machines in highly visible locations is most likely. Again, casinos want players to see players winning and be enticed into trying to get a piece of the casino’sbankroll themselves.
These are the theories I can think of off the top of my head. Maybe you know of some others. Most of the theories have a basis in psychology. When we see others winning, we’llwant to play too because 1) we’re greedy, 2) we’re envious, or 3) we see that at least some machines really do pay off and if we keep trying we might find one too.
Based on my own discussions with slot directors, interviews with slot directors, and seminars I’ve attended, I don’t think these theories are relevant in today’s slot world. To see why,we have to look at how slot machines and slot floors have changed.
Picture a slot floor of 10-20 years ago. Even if you don’t go back that far, I’m sure you’ve seen pictures on TV or in books. The slot machines on a casino floor in that era arearranged in long rows, much like products out for sale in a supermarket aisle. There’s no imagination used in placing the machines on the floor. The machines are placed using cold,mechanical precision.
On page 193 in Slot Machines: A Pictorial History of the First 100 Years by Marshall Fey, there’s a great picture of Bally’s casino floor in Atlantic City that illustrates my point. Thepicture shows hundreds of slot machines all lined up in perfect rows like little soldiers. The caption reads, “Like a Nebraska cornfield, rows upon rows of Bally slots extend as far asthe eye can see.”

Try an online casino for FREE. We have over 15 No Deposit Bonus Codes. No credit card needed, just sign up and startplaying!
Compare that image with the slot floor layout at a casino that was designed in the last five or so years. Studies have shown that players feel very uncomfortable playing in longaisles. They feel trapped when they’re playing in the middle of a long aisle, particularly if the casino is crowded. As a result, modern casinos have shorter aisles and when a long aislecan’t be avoided, it will be wider than others so players won’t feel like they can’t get out.
One of the finding loose machines theories has casinos placing loose machines at the ends of aisles to draw people into the aisles. Having shorter aisles means having more machinesat the ends of those aisles. Can all of these machines be loose?
In addition to being uncomfortable in long aisles, players are also uncomfortable being put out on display for the other players. Perhaps they feel like they might become a target iftheir good luck is too visible.
One slot director I heard speak said that he tried to create “comfortable niches” for his players. Instead of being in a fish bowl, visible to most of the slot floor, players in hisniches can be easily seen by only the other players in that niche.
Another theory about loose machine placement is that casinos place them in highly visible areas. Modern casinos still have highly visible areas, but the areas are visible to a smallernumber of players. A loose machine in this area will influence fewer players than before.
The last change in the slot floor that I want to mention is perhaps the biggest change of all. Casinos used to have hundreds of slot machines. Now they have thousands. Oneslot director in Las Vegas said in an interview a few years ago that with so many machines on his floor, he didn’t have time to micro-manage them. He and his management decided the holdpercentage they wanted for each denomination and he ordered payback programs close to that percentage for his machines. Furthermore, he said this was the common practice in LasVegas.
As much as the slot floor has changed, the changes on the floor are dwarfed by the changes in the slot machines themselves. One thing that struck me about that picture of Bally’s is howall the machines look alike. They really do look like soldiers being inspecting, all standing at attention and in identical uniforms, or like rows of indistinguishable corn plants. In fact, it looks like there are only three different games in the 10 machines in the first row in the picture. Granted, the majority of the machines in Bally’s casino were Ballymachines. Still I’m surprised by the lack of variety in the machines in the front row in the picture.
I heard that one theory why Americans have gotten heavier is that we have access to a wider variety of foods today than we had before. When meals consisted of the same thing time aftertime, it was easy to pass up second helpings of gruel and eat just enough to no longer be hungry. But now we have Chinese one night, Mexican the next, followed by Thai, burgers, pizza,and pasta -- it’s easy to overeat on our culinary trip around the world.
Just as variety in food creates desire, so does variety in slot machines. “Hey, I used to watch The Munsters all the time. I’ll try that machine.” “I never miss TheApprentice. I’ll give that machine a go.” “I played Monopoly all the time as a kid.” “I have a cat and a dog and a chainsaw and a toaster.”
Not only is there more variety in themes on machines, there’s also more variety in paytables. Back in the 1920s, a revolutionary change in slot machine design was paying an extra coin fora certain combination. Adding a hopper to the machine in the electro-mechanical era made it possible for the machine to pay larger jackpots itself instead of requiring a handpay from ajackpot girl. Adding a computer to the slot machine made it possible for today’s machines to pay modest jackpots of a few thousand coins all the way up to life-changing jackpots ofmillions of dollars.
The computer also makes it possible to add more gimmicks to machines. Gimmicks like “spin-til-you win,” symbols that nudge up or down to the payline, haywire repeat-pays, and double spinall add more variety and interest to the games.
Today’s machines are immeasurably more interesting and fun to play than those of even just a decade ago. Each new generation of machines has crisper graphics and better sound than theprior generation. Slot designers are working overtime to devise compelling bonus rounds that will keep players playing for just one more crack at the round. How many people playingWheel of Fortune are trying to win the jackpot? Not many. Most people keep playing to get one more spin of the wheel.
Slot directors today don’t need to pepper their slot floors with loose machines to stimulate play. Today’s machines themselves generate more desire to play than seeing a player doingwell.
Now I'll finish our discussion of where slot directors place loose machines with some additional thoughts, with a few anecdotes I've heard at slot seminars, and with what I think will be thefinal nail in the coffin of loose machine placement philosophies.
One of the placement theories says that tight machines should be placed near the table games because the table games players don’t like a lot of noise while they’re playing. Have the peopleputting forth this theory ever been near a craps table? A craps table with a shooter on a hot roll has to be one of the loudest places -- if not the loudest place -- in the casino. Crapsplayers can be a boisterous lot even when the table isn’t hot. Okay, I can see players needing peace and quiet at blackjack tables (It’s difficult to count cards even in a quiet casino.), butnot at craps, roulette, Let It Ride, and other tables. In any case, the casino can adjust the volume level on a machine. The slot director can put a very quiet, loose machine near the tablesand not disturb a single table games player.
Another problem with following a loose machine placement philosophy is that it limits the flexibility slot directors have in moving their machines around on the slot floor. If the directors aregoing to give up a little bit in payback on some machines, they certainly will want to get their money’s worth and ensure that these machines are in locations where they’ll be played, be seenbeing played, and entice other players to play. Slot floors have only a limited number of high visibility areas. Slot directors won’t want to waste any of their high-paying machines in the morenumerous less visible areas, where the machines won’t be encouraging other players.
Now I’d like to share some anecdotes I’ve heard at panel discussions during the big gaming show (first the World Gaming Congress, then the Global Gaming Expo) that’s held in Las Vegas eachyear.
First, one slot director described an experiment he conducted in his casino. He had a carousel of 5 Times Pay machines that all had the same long-term payback. He ordered new chips to lower thepayback percentages on a couple of the machines to see if anyone would notice. The machines with the lower long-term paybacks received just as much play as the higher-paying machines. Noplayer, furthermore, ever complained that some of the machines in the carousel were tighter than others.
In another seminar, a slot director shared the philosophy he used to place some machines that he had inherited from another property. These machines, he said, had lower long-term paybacks thanthe payback he usually ordered for machines on his slot floor. He said, 'I read the same books that the players read. I put these lower payback machines in the spots that the books said shouldhave the high payback machines.'
My last anecdote is about a decision made by the slot director at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas many years ago. He was ordering 10 Times Pay machines for his slot floor and he was concerned aboutthe low hit frequencies available for those machines. (Machines with multiplying symbols tend to have low hit frequencies, and usually the higher the multiplier, the lower the hit frequency.)The slot director was afraid that his players would think the machines were very tight because they hit so infrequently. He said that he ordered higher paybacks than he usually does for thosemachines in an attempt to offset the low hit frequency. The machines would still have a low hit frequency, but at least the average value of a hit would be a little higher than if he hadordered a payback percentage nearer the percentage he usually ordered. He hoped that would be enough to keep his players from thinking these were tighter than the other machines on his slotfloor.
Although I think these anecdotes are the exceptions that prove the rule that some casinos at least order the same long-term paybacks for machines of a particular denomination, there is evidencethat some casinos may not. In the first edition of Casino Operations Management, for example, Kilby and Fox list a number of “general philosophies that influence specific slot placement”including: “low hold (loose) machines should be placed in busy walkways to create an atmosphere of activity” and “loose machines are normally placed at the beginning and end of trafficpatterns.”
They then say that “high hit frequency machines located around the casino pit area will create an atmosphere of slot activity.” I’m not sure whether they’re saying high hit frequencyshould or shouldn’t be placed near the pit. In any case, note that one philosophy said that loose machines create an atmosphere of activity and another said that high hit frequency machinesalso create an atmosphere of activity. This is the perfect segue into what I think puts the final nail in the coffin about loose machine placement theories.
There is no correlation between long-term payback and hit frequency. A low hit frequency machine can have a high long-term payback. High hit frequency machines, in addition, can have lowlong-term paybacks. Larry Mak, author of Secrets of Modern Slot Playing, recently queried the Nevada Gaming Control Board to find out the payback reported on penny machines. The Board said itwas 90.167%. Most of the penny video slots have very high hit frequencies, yet the overall average long-term payback is very low.
The usual reasoning behind putting loose machines in highly visible areas is so slot players can see other players winning. Maybe we should be more precise here and say that players will seeother players hitting and assume that they are winning because they are playing loose machines. But because there’s no correlation between hit frequency and long-term payback, these players canactually be playing machines with low long-term paybacks.
I don’t put much stock in loose machine placement theories, but I do believe slot directors may follow a hit frequency placement philosophy. Slot directors may try to place high hit frequencymachines in visible areas to encourage play. This philosophy says and implies nothing about the long-term payback of the machines.

John Robison is the author of 'The Slot Expert's Guide
to Playing Slots.' His website iswww.slotexpert.com

Jul 26, 2017

By: Mo Edwards

Making decisions is hard, #amirite? There are so many choices in this modern world! “Should I diversify my IRA or bury it in the backyard?” Depends on your short-term goals. “Should I get a turtle or a dirtbike?” Could go either way. “Should I hike a slot canyon this year?” That one is simple: Yes!

Southern Utah has more tiny, narrow cracks than a shattered iPhone screen. Some are deep, some are wide, some are wet and some are dry, but none of them will shove tiny glass shards in your texting fingers.

Slot canyons are nice because you don’t have to make very many decisions in them. Carved by wind, water and dinosaur tears, slot canyons can be hundreds of feet deep and so narrow you have to cram yourself through sideways. (There’s one near Zion called Fat Man’s Misery.) Another benefit, among many, is that their unique shape and basic astrophysics means slot canyons are shady all but a few minutes a day, making them a pleasant respite from the relentless summer sun!

A word to the wise: Slot canyons can be as dangerous as they are beautiful, much like Kevin Bacon. Much like a giant, bloodthirsty sandworm, flash floods can sneak up on you quick. Rainwater collects from the non-absorbent plateau and drains into these canyons creating an instantaneous wall of water.

DO NOT ENTER A SLOT CANYON IF IT IS RAINING, IF IT HAS RAINED IN THE PAST 24 HOURS OR IF RAIN IS FORECASTED.

Best Place To Play Slots Near Me

Flash flood warning signs:

1. Sudden heavy rains
2. Clear creek water begins to turn brown and muddy
3. Debris such as twigs, leaves or needles appears in the water

Seek high ground immediately! Don’t worry about foot vibrations; just get out of there. Even climbing a few feet could save your life. Check the weather and talk to the appropriate park/BLM authority before you go. And finally, plan an alternative itinerary in case the weather turns against you. If you reeeally want to gamble with slots, go to Vegas. That’ll ruin you too, but more slowly.

Buckskin Gulch (Wire Pass Trailhead)

• Location: Along the Utah/Arizona border, near Kanab.
• Distance: 3.5 miles
• Best for: Families can totally do this slot.
• Best time to go: Spring and fall are ideal, but you can hike here year-round.

The entirety of Buckskin Gulch canyon is one of the longest slots in the world. Or so proclaims the internet. And the internet is always… interesting? ...a spectrum of truth and falsehoods?

Really though, to hike the whole thing would take a few days, a precious permit and some technical gear. Sounds fun! Maybe not with the kids though. Try this: Buckskin Gulch via the Wire Pass trailhead. Wire Pass winds through a spectacularly striated little slot canyon to Buckskin Gulch. There are a few obstacles to toss the kids over (don’t toss the kids; that’s a joke, an internet falsehood, fake news), but nothing prohibitive and round trip it is only 3.5 miles! Do-able for a sturdy five-year-old. Look for petroglyphs at the junction of the two canyons. Bask in the real truthiness of it all.

Little Wild Horse

• Location: South-central Utah near Goblin Valley
• Distance: 8 miles for the full loop, but many just go as far as they like and turn back
• Best for: Ideal for families, but fun for all
• Best time to go: Spring and fall

Best Slots For Free

This place is perfect for all the wobbly little foals in your life. A stone's throw from Goblin Valley — a Burning Man of strange and playful sandstone goblins — Little Wild Horse is a strange and playful sandstone canyon. Smaller in scale than, say, the Narrows, its dry, sandy wash is friendly to all abilities. The kids will naturally propel themselves along the twists and turns with nary an expletive from parents. The entire loop (up Little Wild Horse and down Bell Canyon) is about eight miles — a liiiittle too long for kids who aren’t a pre-Prefontaine, perhaps — but families can explore at their leisure until it’s time to return to the car for more fruit snacks (or kale, or spelt, or gluten-free chia pet seeds, or whatever kids eat these days). If they’re having too much fun galloping about and ignore your call to head back, tell them you’ll call the BLM about some little wild horses in Goblin Valley that need to be immunized. “The feds are coming! With the vacciiiiines!! RUUUUUNNNNNNNN!” Threats don’t work with kids but it doesn't hurt to try.

Spooky and Peekaboo

• Location: On Hole-in-the-Rock Road, 26 miles south of the town of Escalante.
• Distance: 3.5 miles
• Best for: Claustrophiles (is that the opposite of claustrophobes?); robust children and adults unafraid of tight curves and a few drop-offs. Broad-chested, pregnant, or otherwise girthier people might want to skip this one as the paths are extremely narrow.
• Best time to go: Year-round

Have you ever wanted to be bear-hugged by the earth? A nice, firm, sandy squeeze that lingers so long it becomes awkward. “Earth!” you say, “I like you, but… I don’t like-like you.” “Oh,” Earth says, a little embarrassed. “I just thought… maybe you and I—” “No, Earth. No. Our kind cannot be together. We would destroy each other.”

If you’ve never had this conversation, dear reader, you’ve never been to Spooky Gulch. Located along Hole in the Rock Road in Escalante Canyons country, Spooky and Peek A Boo Slot Canyons make a great half-day adventure. Start at the bottom of naturally sculpted Peek A Boo and climb up, passing under a few arches and over a few potholes (usually dry). From the top, follow the cairns over slickrock and sand to the entrance of Spooky. Leave your backpack behind. Shed any unnecessary layers: “fun” hats, push-up bras, ironic mustaches, fanny packs, babies in baby carriers, the ticket to Tremors 7 in your front pocket... Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope and nope. Slide sideways through this narrowest of the earth’s crevices and ponder how a canyon can taper so. Kids love this part! Finally an activity they can accomplish more swiftly than adults. Send them to get help when you find yourself trapped hard in Earth’s awkward embrace.

Furniture Draw

• Location: Along Buckhorn Wash Road in Emery County
• Distance: 2.5 miles
• Best for: Families or anyone looking for an easy hike
• Best time to go: April to October

Sometimes you just need a calm, dependable slot canyon. No 10-inch-wide walls closing in on you, no frigid water to wade or swim through, no rappelling or scrambling or climbing. Like a nice hallway. Furniture Draw is the family-friendly slot canyon you’ve been searching for. Bring sunscreen.

Best Casino Slots Near Me

Zion Narrows

• Location: Zion National Park
• Distance: Variable up to 16 miles
• Best for: Anyone at least four feet tall can hike out-and-back hike from the bottom; at least some hiking experience and endurance are required to do the whole thing top-down.
• Best time to go: Later spring and summer yield lower water levels in the river.

The Narrows in Zion National Park is the one slot canyon to rule them all. The grand dame of gorge-ous divisions. The Citizen Kane of sightly crevasses. The head honcho of heavenly chasms. The Patti Labelle of parted pathways. The Phil Collins of fault-less canyons. The Beyoncé of handsome breaches. In some places the walls rise 1,000 feet above you and the canyon narrows to 20 feet across. It’s almost as dramatic as the rise of Kevin Bacon (the Meryl Streep of actors).

There are a couple ways to go about the Narrows:

1. Start from the bottom at Temple of Sinawava and mosey upstream in the Virgin River. No, not along the river: IN the river. Bring (or rent from local outfitters) some great water shoes and a walking stick for stability on slippery rocks. Sometimes vintage walking sticks au naturel (aka discarded branches) can be found at the beginning of the hike. Continue up the river for two or three hours and arrive at Wall Street, the narrowest section of the canyon. Gawk. Go back from whence you came. Or amble on for a bit; the farther up the canyon you go, the fewer humans you’ll share it with.

2. This hike can also be a 16-mile multi-day trip from the top, granted you are lucky enough to win a permit and popular/rich enough to arrange a shuttle. It's worth a try!

Box Canyon Hiking Trail in Maple Canyon

• Location: Near Fountain Green, Utah
• Distance: 1.2 miles
• Best for: Anyone who can handle some rock scrambling/basic bouldering
• Best time to go: April to October

This out-and-back trail is short, but don’t think you’re getting off easy. It’s all boulders, all the time. You’ll be walking between boulders and towering rock walls, scrambling over boulders, even climbing between cracks in boulders that fell from the cliffs at some point in time. (Don’t think too hard about that, but don’t not think about it either. Falling rock is a risk here.) Boulders, boulders and more boulders.Kids can totally take this trail, but there is one spot where a generous previous hiker secured a rope to a 15-foot boulder that you will need to scale. Your options are to loosen up that protective instinct and let your offspring give it a try, or hit the gym starting now so you can lift them up to a trusty partner who has braved the rock first.At the end of the trail is a lovely waterfall that has yet more boulders and a rope to climb it, but climbing this spot isn’t recommended unless you come prepared with rock-climbing gear.Note that this trail is on private property, but the public currently has permission to scurry and scramble their way through. Check before you go to make sure that’s still true and also that there isn’t water in the canyon.

Zebra Canyon

• Location: Grand Staircase-Escalante National Monument
• Distance: 5.3 miles out and back
• Best for: Moderate to more experienced hikers
• Best time to go: April to November

Zebra Slot Canyon delivers exactly what it promises: some really cool zebra-ish stripes on its narrow walls that are sure to make you the coolest kid on Instagram. That is, if you’re tough enough to earn them. You’ll enjoy a roasty walk through the desert and Harris Wash to get to the slot canyon, which does not take too long to slither through. (And slithering is about what you should expect — at one point the canyon focuses down to a 10-inch gap. Suck it in!) There are watery spots as well, and while you may see people leaving their shoes at the entrance, you’d be better off hoisting your kicks aloft as you ford the chilly pits. There are places in the canyon that you might not be able to do barefoot. And then you won’t get those Instagram shots of the zebra stripes at the end. And then you’ll be sad. However, do leave your backpack at the entrance as there’s no room for that baby. If you really want to go for the gold, you can keep going through the zebra stripes to the dry fall on the other side where the canyon opens back up again, but this is no small feat and most people treat that trek as an out-and-back. But if you’re still feeling un-slot-isfied after Zebra Slot Canyon, you can head back to Harris Wash and continue on your merry way to nearby Tunnel Slot Canyon.

Willis Creek Slot Canyon

• Location: Grand Staircase–Escalante National Monument, near Cannonville
• Distance: About 3 miles out and back
• Best for: Everyone
• Best time to go: April to October, but summer is very hot

Willis Creek is one of those unexpected, under-respected kinds of places. Nearby, flashier neighbors like Bryce Canyon and Kodachrome Basin State Park steal all the thunder. Because who can top colorful sandstone spires or golden arches shining in the sun? Willis Creek Slot Canyon, that’s who! Or maybe top isn’t the right word. Complement. Willis Creek Slot Canyon is the perfect complement to its fabulous canyon friends. With its trickling creek and gorgeous canyon walls, Willis Creek is the friend you almost forgot to invite but turns out to be the life of the party.

The trail starts out through brush and trees, then takes a turn down toward Willis Creek. After that, you’ll follow along with the creek the rest of the way. Your feet will get wet so plan accordingly. The canyon walls start off low and comfy but the farther you go, the more they close in on you until you’re snuggled in the earth’s warm clutches. (“No” means “no,” Earth!) The hike is fun for all and great for kids, who will enjoy skipping their way through the creek. Check conditions before you go. Rain can cancel the viability of not only the slot canyon but also Skutumpah Road by which you access it.

The Subway (Top-Down Route)

• Location: Zion National Park
• Distance: 9.5 miles
• Best for: Experienced climbers
• Best time to go: Later summer through early October

Zion National Park is home to more than one slot canyon. While the Narrows may be the Preciousssss, the Subway is still a classic, like Breakfast at Tiffany’s or Casablanca or the first Star Wars (the original one, before George Lucas discovered CGI). But be aware that the Subway will kick your booty into next week and you shouldn’t underestimate it. It’s a tough, semi-technical journey, especially leaving the canyon when there’s nothing to look forward to but your job and the melted fruit snacks in your car. But on the way in, you’ll be looking forward to one of the most beautiful slot canyons in Utah.

The top-down route is the classic way to get to this classic canyon. This route involves wading, scrambling, slip-sliding, climbing your way down the Left Fork of the North Creek. Expect a long, hard 6–10 hour day with a few rappels, down-climbs and a couple surprisingly chilly swimming sessions. But all work and no play makes Jack/ie a dull climber, so take plenty of time to use all your senses. The reward for all your work: the tubular — in both senses — rock formations that give the hike its name. They’re just a smidge photogenic.

If technical climbing isn’t your bag of gummy worms, you can also start and end your climb at the Left Fork Trailhead, which is about 8.2 miles up the Kolob Terrace Road from Virgin, Utah. This route is not technical and you can still see some waterfalls and the lower Subway formations. It’s still a slog, though, and you’ll be hiking for 5–9 hours, and the scenery is not nearly as great as the top-down route.

Note that you will need a permit as this hike has become so popular that visitors are now limited to 80 per day. You can get a permit from the National Park Service a few months in advance through a lottery process, or cross your fingers for a last-minute drawing two to seven days before you’d like to go.

Burro Wash

• Location: Capitol Reef National Park, 7.8 miles down Notom-Bullfrog Road
• Distance: 8 miles
• Best for: Experienced canyon-country hikers
• Best time to go: Spring and fall

Loosest Slots Near Me

There are a few slot canyons in Capitol Reef National Park but Burro Wash gets the most action. This canyon requires some skill and, depending on how far you go, can give you an excuse to slide your butt cheeks into a climbing harness.The hike starts with a two-mile trek through an open wash before you get into the canyon. Once you’re there, expect a slot chock-full of chockstones — giant boulders that fell in/conveniently into your path. Bonus: Sometimes you get to approach them from a pool of water. Some of the chockstones in Burro Wash have ways you can bypass them, while others require Spider-Man web-jets (or climbing gear in a pinch). After several of these chockstones, you’ll reach a set of not one, but two of them near the end of the trek. If you can get past these babies, the hike ends soon after at a pour-off about 3.5 miles from the trailhead. Unless you’ve got mad technical skills and a shuttle, this is an out-and-back hike.